"Donna Katie Patterson Olsen, 90, of Boise, passed away peacefully in her home Monday August 8th, 2011."
That's the opener from my Grandmother's brief Obituary in the Idaho Statesman. It's short, appropriate, and covers all the bases, birthdate, place, marriage, children, the list of who she's survived by and a one or two of her interests and hobbies. I'm sure everyone feels though that a snippet in a newspaper can never capture a loved one. I'm not sure a blog post can either but maybe this will help my own memory in the future. Here's my tribute.
I never knew how to describe my grandma to anyone else. I introduced her to some of my friends over the years, and I hope they were able to get a taste of who she was, and I know that everyone's grandmother was special to them. But indulge me when I say that my grandma has a little something extra. If I had to use three figures to triangulate who she was, I can only say she's some mix between Mother Theresa, David McCullough, and Winnie the Pooh. Let me show you why.
Mother Teresa: Someone at the funeral told a story of how grandma was introduced to someone fallen on hard times. "Go to Warm Springs and take a left, go down to the second to last house on the right and knock on the door. You'll find a free dinner, a hug, and a friend for life in the woman who lives there." Grandma had to feed everyone (Including the world's fattest squirrels in her back yard, I'm not kidding they're the size of Beagles), she was ninety years old and she had to help, she couldn't hear anything but she had to listen to how you were, every detail. The absolute worst insult she could bestow on someone living was "That Turkey", or maybe stinker if it was someone horrible and dead like Stalin or Genghis Khan. Don't cross her though or she might threaten to whup you and then laugh at herself for even thinking she could make herself hurt somebody.
David McCullough: The woman had history bleeding out of her dry irritated calves (seriously though she wouldn't stop scratching that leg). Grandma could turn literally any conversation in to a history lecture. Talking about the grocery list turned into Shakespeare, and then of course we had ancestors who were in Warwickshire when he was born, "And so you KNOW we're shirttail relatives charlie!" and then to Everette Farmer Dix somehow. Nothing worried her more than her descendants forgetting about their ancestors. It may not all have taken, but I know where George Washington Farnsworth, Ethel May Dix, and William Patterson all fit in Grandma. Hopefully I'll develop enough respect for what my heritage means someday.
Winnie the Pooh: For a woman so smart, no one could possibly be more bumbling and silly on the surface. (Key: On the Surface) The woman was just so unintentionally funny, and intentionally. She even had her own vocabulary. Grandchildren were "Beauties." Any and every piece of furniture was the Davenport. "Oh honey put the strawberries on the Davenport" "C'mere and put your bottom on the davenport and let's talk," "I think the letters and in the... davenport." Phrases like "Love your heart," and "You duffs!" had whole layers of meaning coming from her.
I'm one of 19 Grandchildren but from when her and Grandpa took me to see the our new house being built (My earliest memory), to letting me sleep over at her house when I had nothing to do, to the day that I had to be the one who found her after she'd gone, I always knew she loved me uniquely.
So Grandma, Happy Birthday today, I miss you, say hi to Grandpa, I'll try not to be too sad since I know you're so happy. Don't give up on me as I try to be a little bit more like you.
